From what I can infer from Norah's description of her mother and her sister, I have a dichotomous view. What do I mean? There is a description in the book where Norah's is remembering what her mother said to her about always being a lady even if she did not marry. I gather from that paragraph that Norah was the "good"daughter. Ummm... she was kind of a prisoner of what her mother thought she should be compared to Bree. I mean it sounds like her mother wanted or expected her to be a perfect lady/wife/mother. Consequently, she complied with this. So, how would this have affected Phoebe? I think that possibly since Phoebe was less than perfect, she may have had difficulty dealing with the imperfection of her daughter. ON THE OTHER HAND.... I gathered from the display of love and affection for Paul ( as a baby and early on) that she could have been a very loving mother. I mean... it is difficult for me to answer this because by the time she had met Phoebe, Norah had gone through many changes in finding herself. Ultimately, I don't think she would have given Phoebe away...
If David had not given Phoebe away I think he may have been able to face his demons, and stop living the lie that he had created for his adult life. I think that he and Norah would have been able to grow together, and compliment each other/support in those areas that were so painful for both of them. It is interesting that he had created a life with what could be viewed as a "little white lie" by not correcting his college admission papers. He just kept layering lie after lie after lie for his whole adult life... not just with the birth of Phoebe. Maybe he just wasn't a truthful person deep down on the inside, he would lie when it wasn't even necessary, so maybe being truthful with Norah would not have changed him one bit!
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If David would have been honest from the beginning, Norah would have definitely been upset at him, but they would have gotten Phoebe back, and perhaps lived semi-normal lives. I think Norah would have accepted the child regardless of the Down’s syndrome. Norah would have had the appropriate means in order to care for her, compared to David’s little sister.
Their lives would have been better. David would have faced his sister’s disability by caring for Phoebe, and would learn that although having a child with a disability is no easy task, they had the means to care for her (both monetary and loving). Norah had so much potential for love, but instead it was consumed by the claimed death of a daughter. The whole family chemistry would have been completely different. It is a shame how such an event can shape the rest of your life.
I like what you said Goins, David was layering lie, upon lie, upon lie. David placed his life on a shaky foundation. He tried to fix the structure, but if the foundation is not stable the structure will eventually collapse.
I think the both of you reponded eloquently. I totally agree with the both of you. I will only add that, yes their lives would have been different, but more functional. Norah would have loved Phoebe and I think she would have done the same as Caroline and gotten her help. She seemed kind of "weak" in the beginning, but I think Bree would have set her straight. David, like you said Goins, would have faced his demons and would have been a better father and husband to his family. Paul would have loved his sister, he may have resented some of the attention Phoebe got, but David could have been instrumental in helping him deal with that since he had been through it as a child. The entire dynamics of this family would have been different. Its amazing how one event can change your entire life for the better or worst.
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